Cyber-Bullying: Has It Gone Too Far?

Eorzea Time
 
 
 
Language: JP EN FR DE
Version 3.1
New Items
users online
Forum » Everything Else » Culture and Media » Cyber-Bullying: Has it gone too far?
Cyber-Bullying: Has it gone too far?
First Page 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
 Phoenix.Degs
Offline
Server: Phoenix
Game: FFXI
user: Degs
Posts: 2448
By Phoenix.Degs 2013-04-14 10:07:59
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
Bismarck.Bloodrose said: »
Well in our current age and use of language, "***" is used as a slang term to more commonly insult a specific group of people, not refer to themselves.
Individuals HAVE to look at what's happening around them, and to them, in order to take stock of the positive and negatives, and they are weighted differently for each person.
I have had quite a few goood experiences in my life during my scholastic years which made surviving some of the more extreme cases of bullying much easier. That said, when you are a victim of daily, constant, extreme amounts and extreme bullying, including physical assaults, threats, defamation of character, and so on, especially in the information age, where it's literally impossible to run away from, you can't escape. Should you be happy that you stil have one good leg to stand on? Sure. But you're still gonna be pissed off someone broke the other, and depressed as hell, atleast for a while, that you lost some mobility. There are also the problems that come associated with a broken leg, even after it's been healed. Nerve and Tissue Damage - since we're going with a broken leg analogy, i'm going to continue with it. The exterior, and much of the interior has healed, but something's still not 100%. You won't notice it at first, but it's there, and it slowly makes itself more apparent with time.
Ever hear the phrase that "There are some things that time cannot erase"? Well, it's true. Especially in the extremes that people have been going to with bullying.
You are talking to me like I don't know how it feels.

I do. I just had/have bigger concerns in my life. Like I said, I understand now that most of that unwarranted anger towards someone they didn't know (me) was due to issues that they themselves had.
thats not always the case... you can come from a very positive home and a very good life, and still be a rotten little ***
 Valefor.Sehachan
Guide Maker
Offline
Server: Valefor
Game: FFXI
user: Seha
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2013-04-14 10:09:37
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
You're going to have a hard time with the rest of your life. Not because of your bullies, but because of your attitude.

You're not a bad person, get over it. Nothing they said was true. Nothing they did to you was your fault. It was a kid that didn't have something they needed and therefore tried to make themselves feel better by making you feel worse.

Don't you have goals or something?
You're just shrugging it off like it's no big deal, one of the people I talked about earlier. Well, in some cases it is, in mine it was. I said I'm not going into details, so I would appreciate if you would stop with your assumptions about me.

Don't generalize, everyone has had a different story, some lighter, some worse.
 
Offline
Posts:
By 2013-04-14 10:09:45
 Undelete | Edit  | Link | Quote | Reply
 
Post deleted by User.
[+]
 Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Nahh
Posts: 62
By Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh 2013-04-14 10:10:03
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Phoenix.Degs said: »
Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
Valefor.Sehachan said: »
Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
This is your problem. You aren't seeing the good things in your life, only the negatives.
I'm glad you found the Nirvana, I haven't.
You're going to have a hard time with the rest of your life. Not because of your bullies, but because of your attitude.

You're not a bad person, get over it. Nothing they said was true. Nothing they did to you was your fault. It was a kid that didn't have something they needed and therefore tried to make themselves feel better by making you feel worse.

Don't you have goals or something?
Could almost ask you the same question... They way you are talking to her, is very conceded.... You are putting her down and being very argumentative. You could almost say you are being a bully.
And I could simply say that you are being overly-sensitive and non-conducive to the answer of their problem.

You are making it ok to be depressed and down on yourself. I am telling them that they aren't a bad person that they simply have a negative attitude about it and that it is very easily solved once you take steps in the right direction.
 Bahamut.Genevie
Offline
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
user: Geneviee
Posts: 415
By Bahamut.Genevie 2013-04-14 10:12:10
Link | Quote | Reply
 
And henceforth everyone was cured!
 Cerberus.Senkyuutai
Offline
Server: Cerberus
Game: FFXI
user: Yuffy
Posts: 4415
By Cerberus.Senkyuutai 2013-04-14 10:12:43
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Valefor.Sehachan said: »
Bullies being lower individuals than me does not matter at all to me. Once they've ruined my life where they are now is of 0 importance to me, I care about myself, not if karma got them back.
This.

Also, if you are objective about your life, you'll notice that very often the people who bullied you have a much better life than you will ever have.

Luck in life is something very frustrating sometime.
[+]
 Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Nahh
Posts: 62
By Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh 2013-04-14 10:15:08
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Valefor.Sehachan said: »
You're just shrugging it off like it's no big deal, one of the people I talked about earlier. Well, in some cases it is, in mine it was. I said I'm not going into details, so I would appreciate if you would stop with your assumptions about me.

Don't generalize, everyone has had a different story, some lighter, some worse.
I'm not saying it's a not a big deal. I'm saying that it's not some unbeatable monster that you should allow to run your life.

I hope you can let someone in eventually and talk about it, because I think it's going to help.

Phoenix.Degs said: »
thats not always the case... you can come from a very positive home and a very good life, and still be a rotten little ***
That doesn't mean they aren't lacking something.


Asura.Bartimaeus said: »
It's not that I don't agree with some of the things you've said, I just wanted to say I think people come to the place ~you~ are at, at different times in their life. [That's my assumption that you seem to be in a decent place now.]

I mean.. bullying does tend to start at an age in which children are building themselves up. I can imagine that this takes it's toll in varying degrees.

It's not to say anything you've experienced is "less bad" or "more bad", I'd just tend to think 'different. As far as that whole human experience goes.
I understand.
 Bismarck.Bloodrose
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Bloodrose
Posts: 4322
By Bismarck.Bloodrose 2013-04-14 10:16:12
Link | Quote | Reply
 
What really pisses me off, especially in topics about bullying, are those who shrug it off as "no big deal", for whatever reason, and completely invalidate the way people feel about the issue, their past, and how they felt during the time they were bullied - which is a progenitor towards the laid back attitude people have about not touching the subject.
[+]
 Bahamut.Genevie
Offline
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
user: Geneviee
Posts: 415
By Bahamut.Genevie 2013-04-14 10:19:30
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Yep!Don't come in here lecturing people on how they should have gotten over it by now, and how it's all their fault for being so negative.If it really was as easy as a few simple steps and it would be amazing.But this is real life and it simply doesn't happen like that.Also those people have 'always' had it far far worse than anyone else, therefore if they have got over it so should everyone else.Wake up!
[+]
 Phoenix.Degs
Offline
Server: Phoenix
Game: FFXI
user: Degs
Posts: 2448
By Phoenix.Degs 2013-04-14 10:19:52
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Listen guys.... I enjoyed discussing this stuff with you, and I wish you all the best. Im off to clean my sons toy-afied room lol.. Have a great one!
 Bahamut.Genevie
Offline
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
user: Geneviee
Posts: 415
By Bahamut.Genevie 2013-04-14 10:20:24
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Have fun :) and a nice Sunday!
 Phoenix.Degs
Offline
Server: Phoenix
Game: FFXI
user: Degs
Posts: 2448
By Phoenix.Degs 2013-04-14 10:20:38
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bahamut.Genevie said: »
Have fun :) and a nice Sunday!
To you aswell!
 Leviathan.Syagin
Offline
Server: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
user: Kerron
Posts: 999
By Leviathan.Syagin 2013-04-14 10:21:16
Link | Quote | Reply
 
With all the forums I have read on bullying i have to ask... what is your personal opinion on how to stop it? or even reduce it because we all know it's not going anywhere we are primal as human and the life long clique will always exist only the strong survive ... so whats your solution?
[+]
 Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Nahh
Posts: 62
By Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh 2013-04-14 10:25:03
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bahamut.Genevie said: »
Yep!Don't come in here lecturing people on how they should have gotten over it by now, and how it's all their fault for being so negative.If it really was as easy as a few simple steps and it would be amazing.But this is real life and it simply doesn't happen like that.Also those people have 'always' had it far far worse than anyone else, therefore if they have got over it so should everyone else.Wake up!
I'm going to apologize in the most sincerest manner and assure you that I am not just saying this to hurt you, but I really do think you're an idiot.

Sorry for telling you all to be positive and move on because you aren't as bad as you think you are. I'll let you guys be hard on yourselves and be depressed for the rest of your lives. You're all absolutely right, you suck and should feel bad.
[+]
 Valefor.Sehachan
Guide Maker
Offline
Server: Valefor
Game: FFXI
user: Seha
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2013-04-14 10:31:15
Link | Quote | Reply
 
You are the idiot now.
[+]
 Cerberus.Senkyuutai
Offline
Server: Cerberus
Game: FFXI
user: Yuffy
Posts: 4415
By Cerberus.Senkyuutai 2013-04-14 10:31:40
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bahamut.Genevie said: »
Yep!Don't come in here lecturing people on how they should have gotten over it by now, and how it's all their fault for being so negative.If it really was as easy as a few simple steps and it would be amazing.But this is real life and it simply doesn't happen like that.Also those people have 'always' had it far far worse than anyone else, therefore if they have got over it so should everyone else.Wake up!
While I understand what you mean and it makes sense, you aren't trying to understand the other side which is the issue here.

Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
Bahamut.Genevie said: »
Yep!Don't come in here lecturing people on how they should have gotten over it by now, and how it's all their fault for being so negative.If it really was as easy as a few simple steps and it would be amazing.But this is real life and it simply doesn't happen like that.Also those people have 'always' had it far far worse than anyone else, therefore if they have got over it so should everyone else.Wake up!
I'm going to apologize in the most sincerest manner and assure you that I am not just saying this to hurt you, but I really do think you're an idiot.

Sorry for telling you all to be positive and move on because you aren't as bad as you think you are. I'll let you guys be hard on yourselves and be depressed for the rest of your lives. You're all absolutely right, you suck and should feel bad.
What I learned is that people being depressed cannot all be helped. Some don't want to be helped, others just cannot wrap their head around this speficic concept.

Therefore, you have to learn when to not push them too far and just let them deal with it, they'll find a way one day, or not.

Leviathan.Syagin said: »
With all the forums I have read on bullying i have to ask... what is your personal opinion on how to stop it? or even reduce it because we all know it's not going anywhere we are primal as human and the life long clique will always exist only the strong survive ... so whats your solution?
Bullying is part of life, unfortunately. Only advice I can give is to try by all mean to change your life whenever you can, by moving to another place for example, whatever, escape it. Some people can't, some people are too young to do it and so on.

Sometime there is no solution at all and it can't be solved. It's probably the hardest thing to accept, but it is a possibility.
 Bahamut.Genevie
Offline
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
user: Geneviee
Posts: 415
By Bahamut.Genevie 2013-04-14 10:34:46
Link | Quote | Reply
 
I do understand the other side.My daughter came through it!My son didn't.This post was actually aimed at one particular poster who actually didn't seem to think there 'was' another side.I'm sorry if I gave the impression I didn't understand the other side.
 Cerberus.Senkyuutai
Offline
Server: Cerberus
Game: FFXI
user: Yuffy
Posts: 4415
By Cerberus.Senkyuutai 2013-04-14 10:37:08
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bahamut.Genevie said: »
I do understand the other side.My daughter came through it!My son didn't.This post was actually aimed at one particular poster who actually didn't seem to think there 'was' another side.I'm sorry if I gave the impression I didn't understand the other side.
Much like some depressed people can't imagine feeling better one day and getting through it, some people trying to help can't imagine someone depressed not being able to get through it one day.

That's why it's so hard to help depressed people sometime, or downright impossible.
 Bahamut.Genevie
Offline
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
user: Geneviee
Posts: 415
By Bahamut.Genevie 2013-04-14 10:38:33
Link | Quote | Reply
 
You can help to a degree, but the person has to help themselves too.It's hard work I know lol.
 Valefor.Sehachan
Guide Maker
Offline
Server: Valefor
Game: FFXI
user: Seha
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2013-04-14 10:39:55
Link | Quote | Reply
 
I'm not even being depressed, I merely asked to stop placing assumptions about me. I don't state my problems are bigger than those of others, or that no one can understand, etc, simply Nah~ is too quick to jump to "you're just negative about it".
 Fenrir.Camiie
Offline
Server: Fenrir
Game: FFXI
user: Camiie
Posts: 817
By Fenrir.Camiie 2013-04-14 10:41:07
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Leviathan.Syagin said: »
With all the forums I have read on bullying i have to ask... what is your personal opinion on how to stop it? or even reduce it because we all know it's not going anywhere we are primal as human and the life long clique will always exist only the strong survive ... so whats your solution?

There is no single solution. Each situation must be taken on an individual basis. That's one of the biggest problems in all this. People act as though every case of bullying can be solved in the same way. Nothing could be further from the truth.

"Oh just punch the bully in the nose!" "Oh just ignore them and they'll go away!" Occasionally those are the answers, but often they don't help at all or end up making things worse.

Not every bully is cut from the same cloth, nor is every victim. We're not dealing with one-dimensional, stock cartoon characters here. The bullies don't all use the same methods or respond in the same way to the same things.

My general recommendation would be to do away with "zero-tolerance" policies and stop punishing (legitimate) victims of bullying alongside their tormentors. Actually investigate the issue and provide support for the victim and punishment AND support for the bully if it's deemed to be needed. Start caring about the kids as individuals and not just meat-bags who get us Federal funds.
 Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Nahh
Posts: 62
By Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh 2013-04-14 10:41:43
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Valefor.Sehachan said: »
I'm not even being depressed, I merely asked to stop placing assumptions about me. I don't state my problems are bigger than those of others, or that no one can understand, etc, simply Nah~ is too quick to jump to "you're just negative about it".
You are.

Bahamut.Genevie said: »
I do understand the other side.

You don't.
[+]
 Leviathan.Syagin
Offline
Server: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
user: Kerron
Posts: 999
By Leviathan.Syagin 2013-04-14 10:50:53
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Fenrir.Camiie said: »
Leviathan.Syagin said: »
With all the forums I have read on bullying i have to ask... what is your personal opinion on how to stop it? or even reduce it because we all know it's not going anywhere we are primal as human and the life long clique will always exist only the strong survive ... so whats your solution?
There is no single solution. Each situation must be taken on an individual basis. That's one of the biggest problems in all this. People act as though every case of bullying can be solved in the same way. Nothing could be further from the truth. "Oh just punch the bully in the nose!" "Oh just ignore them and they'll go away!" Occasionally those are the answers, but often they don't help at all or end up making things worse. Not every bully is cut from the same cloth, nor is every victim. We're not dealing with one-dimensional, stock cartoon characters here. The bullies don't all use the same methods or respond in the same way to the same things. My general recommendation would be to do away with "zero-tolerance" policies and stop punishing (legitimate) victims of bullying alongside their tormentors. Actually investigate the issue and provide support for the victim and punishment AND support for the bully if it's deemed to be needed. Start caring about the kids as individuals and not just meat-bags who get us Federal funds.
actually i beg the differ... there is one common thing in bullying no matter what it is "fear" the question is... "how do you solution that?" how do you channel the fear?
Offline
Posts: 55
By Endtanis 2013-04-14 11:10:09
Link | Quote | Reply
 
I don't often post, but I recently found a video that touches on the subject of bullying. I apologize if it's been reposted 1000 times, but I haven't seen it in this thread so I thought I'd share.

YouTube Video Placeholder
 Odin.Hirokei
Offline
Server: Odin
Game: FFXI
user: Kaisuko
Posts: 287
By Odin.Hirokei 2013-04-14 11:28:11
Link | Quote | Reply
 
I understand what Nahhhh is saying, but telling someone they're wrong for how they're handling something isn't going to help, and as this goes on he's sounding like an *** about it. Not to mention he doesn't know the story of each individual.

While I agree that people shouldn't dwell on the past, I also understand how it can affect your present. It's not always as simple as "I realize I'm stronger than this, I can move on". It's sometimes more psychological than that. It can feel like it's who you are, rather than a "problem" that can be fixed.
 Sylph.Jrpg
Offline
Server: Sylph
Game: FFXI
user: ohnogc
Posts: 161
By Sylph.Jrpg 2013-04-14 11:43:59
Link | Quote | Reply
 
I wish Nah was around to help prevent all these suicides from bullying. He really would've helped them by telling them to get over it and guilt them for not having done so already.

Seriously, don't act like you know anything of people's situations, or how easy it is to handle what can be a truly debilitating experience for people. I don't even care if I'm putting words in your mouth, because you're the one guilting victims and assuming it's less of a bigger deal than it is.

I was bullied throughout middle school and high school, and I eventually stuck up for myself. I got in trouble, but for the most part they stopped bothering me. I also kinda hung out with the bigger kids too, so that helped. I'd say most of the bullying is behind me; perhaps I "got over it", and I haven't noticed any negative long-term effects from it. I still would've preferred never having to deal with it, and I think bullying should be taken more seriously. Because, you know, suicides and all.
[+]
 Lakshmi.Aelius
VIP
Offline
Server: Lakshmi
Game: FFXI
user: Aelius
By Lakshmi.Aelius 2013-04-14 11:44:56
Link | Quote | Reply
 
There's one way to combat cyber-bullying.

Do not put stupid ***on the internet (ie: a video or photo) with your name plastered all over it.

Otherwise, ignore the trolls.
 Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Offline
Server: Bismarck
Game: FFXI
user: Nahh
Posts: 62
By Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh 2013-04-14 11:44:57
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Odin.Hirokei said: »
I understand what Nahhhh is saying, but telling someone they're wrong for how they're handling something isn't going to help, and as this goes on he's sounding like an *** about it. Not to mention he doesn't know the story of each individual.

While I agree that people shouldn't dwell on the past, I also understand how it can affect your present. It's not always as simple as "I realize I'm stronger than this, I can move on". It's sometimes more psychological than that. It can feel like it's who you are, rather than a "problem" that can be fixed.
My issues are these:

-It's not how they're handling. They aren't handling at all which is what I see as being wrong.
-I don't know the story because when I have asked they refuse to talk about it yet want people to know that they have the problem obviously if they're talking about it openly and INSISTING that it's some horrible event that is somehow impossible to overcome.

"Look at me I'm sad!"
"Why are you sad?"
"I'm NOT going to talk about it!"

At this point it just looks like they want attention rather than help. They want to cling to it like a crutch and use it as an excuse for why they became how they are instead of stopping and taking time to understand what happened and that's stupid in my eyes.

How are you going to fix the issue you claim to have if your answer is to stay in your shell? If you really didn't want anyone's help with it you wouldn't have even *** brought it up.

Then you have the people that are just circle jerking and really not contributing anything at all. That's a separate thing all together.
 Odin.Hirokei
Offline
Server: Odin
Game: FFXI
user: Kaisuko
Posts: 287
By Odin.Hirokei 2013-04-14 11:48:16
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Bismarck.Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh said: »
Odin.Hirokei said: »
I understand what Nahhhh is saying, but telling someone they're wrong for how they're handling something isn't going to help, and as this goes on he's sounding like an *** about it. Not to mention he doesn't know the story of each individual.

While I agree that people shouldn't dwell on the past, I also understand how it can affect your present. It's not always as simple as "I realize I'm stronger than this, I can move on". It's sometimes more psychological than that. It can feel like it's who you are, rather than a "problem" that can be fixed.
My issues are these:

-It's not how they're handling. They aren't handling at all which is what I see as being wrong.
-I don't know the story because when I have asked they refuse to talk about it yet want people to know that they have the problem obviously if they're talking about it openly and INSISTING that it's some horrible event that is somehow impossible to overcome.

"Look at me I'm sad!"
"Why are you sad?"
"I'm NOT going to talk about it!"

At this point it just looks like they want attention rather than help. They want to cling to it like a crutch and use it as an excuse for why they became how they are instead of stopping and taking time to understand what happened and that's stupid in my eyes.

How are you going to fix the issue you claim to have if your answer is to stay in your shell? If you really didn't want anyone's help with it you wouldn't have even *** brought it up.

Then you have the people that are just circle jerking and really not contributing anything at all. That's a separate thing all together.
How is not wanting to tell a whole internet forum your problems looking for attention? They were giving some insight to how they've had to deal with bullying and the situation isn't as simple to fix as it sounds.
[+]
 Valefor.Sehachan
Guide Maker
Offline
Server: Valefor
Game: FFXI
user: Seha
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2013-04-14 11:49:21
Link | Quote | Reply
 
Get off me, you're an imbecile.
First Page 2 3 4 5 6 7 8