I think it's smart of you not to rush into a marriage with the guy, Zah. It seems to me that more often than not, the children of parents who are only together for the sake of the kids know that on some level, and it doesn't do those kids any favors. I'd rather grow up in a happy single-parent home than in a bitter two-parent home.
As the child of a single mother, I can attest to aspects of it that are not something I would wish upon another child...
First, make sure that IF POSSIBLE the child has a healthy understanding of whatever they want to know about their father. I didn't meet my biological father until I was almost an adult. I battled with fantasies, and exaggerations of whom I imagined my father to be. I subconsciously thought somethign was wrong with me because OBVIOUSLY something had to be for him to never even want to meet me, right?
Second, I developed an almost uncomfortable familiarity with women. Hell, I thought for a while I might be gay because i was raised by a single mom (i was disgusted by the thought of "being" with a guy but I had no male role model to give me a sexual identity as a pre-teen). The irony was that the familiarity with my feminine side and lack of the "sacredness" of the mother figure in a dual parent household (mom worked all day to pay for our life) I ended up being a womanizing piece of ***. Years of maturity (you kids calling 24 old >.>) have brought me to a point I regret those mistakes and the poor girls I hurt. It still is important to make sure you balance work/homelife.
Lastly, make sure that if a relevant male role model isn't present that you at least accomodate the upbringing of the child. I was laughed at and assumed "weak" because I had no idea as to anything about sports or "manly stuff". I got into plenty fights before adulthood because I didn't realise I didn't have to "prove" I wasn't a sissy because I didn't have a daddy or know how the hell to shoot a lay up.
Regardless of whether you and your babydaddy work out, Zah, an un-married mother is something to truly respect. I wish you all the blessings in the world and I'm sure you'll be just fine.
If anyone dis-respects you lemme know and I'll break their nose in 3 places. :x
