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correct. you can take my wedding ring off my cold dead hand

most people, when they think about the future, only think about the good parts. the happilly ever after.

my wife could pull a britney spears, shave her head bald, get strung out on crystal meth and bone everyone in range.

that doesn't change my promise. and that's what I'm saying.

If the other person's behavior can influence your side of the deal than it isn't a real deal to begin with

Nothing against people who have an arrangement with their spouse to freely see other people

I mean, I think of marriage as a contract to hopefully be married ubtil someone dies

But realistically that isn't always the case, believing otherwise is honestly foolish

***happens, sometimes another person with your spouse in bed included

So if your wife were to die would you never remarry or attempt to find love again?

My word to be loyal honest faithfull etc is irregardless to the other person's behavior which you can't control anyways.

It would be dumb, I think, to make a promise if you have no intention of keeping it if the other person gets ill, as one example

It made my mom leaving my dad much easier

To be honest (at the time) he deserved it. He is a better man now, but definitely did not always have his ***together (thanks alcoholism)

no I would have to kill myself. that's when the contract ends.

But here is where it gets hairy for me. Most if not all divorces I've been witness to have occurred because the bolded did not happen which is why I had issue with your previous comment.

One of the partners was not cherished or honored and had not been for multiple years.

Does that not constitute a breaking of word and contract and therefore make a divorce the right option?

Where do you draw the line?

I guess technically the loophole here might be killing your spouse

yeah me too.

I mean I guess technically you can sort of just get "married" without going to the government and what not (at least in the states) you just don't get some of the benefits that might come with being seen as officially married by the government

Unless, is there some sort of trouble you can get into for getting unofficially married (unofficially at least to the government)

No. there are no loopholes in my marraige. I think it's a either promise that can't be broken. or you just shouldn't do it. In a weird your word is your bond and if you don't keeo your word you aren't a man type of deal.

when you think about, in a "traditional wedding" you make a promise to your wife, her father, the rest of her family, all of your family and everyone else you invited which may or may not include "god"

not to be a douchebag

you're going to love honor and cherish her until you die no matter what.

and sure, that can mean different things to different people so you should probably lay out all the ground rules beforehand so everyone has a clear understanding of the deal

All relationships should start with marriage instead of it being the ultimate goal. Think about how much money you'd both save in taxes.

Exactly, trying to argue that marriage should be incredibly sacred to everyone is ridiculous given all the different reasons there are for a marriage occurring.

Marriage isn't a simple "these people are in love and want to show their devotion," Marriage is closer to "these people are somehow mutually beneficial to each other(or their families) as a unit for x reason."

Hell, in some cultures people have their marriages arranged and sometimes meet only a little while before their marriage

Marriage isn't a simple thing summed up to one group of peoples' beliefs. It's done in different ways and for different reasons

Humans and their relationships are in such a constant state of change it's really weird that we attempt to bind either into some kind of contracted commitment.

But another cause of higher divorce rates may be because we live longer these days than before... when you only have to spend 10-20 years with your spouse compared to 30-50+ I feel like that really changes the commitment level.

I'm technically a ***... So... I guess they were never hitched in the first place


I mean to be fair isn't marriage what the (likely)two people in love make of it?

To one couple it's a union sanctified by god, but to others it could be a way to show their commitment or love for each other, and to others it could be just because "it's the right time"

I would honestly rather a married couple who finds it's not meant to be get a divorce instead of leading to a potential situation where no one is happy

Obviously a relationship goes through ups and downs, but if it's always downs then married or not eventually something has got to give. That and things happen, and people change. The lerson you married last year may not really be exactly the same perspn, I find this to be the case more often in the (idiotic to me) situations where two people decide to get married at 18

So it's purely religiously significant to you?

This doesn't really make its purpose hold up that well, a "simple" changing of one person's spiritual belief would essentially break the "contract" because you'd essentially be under new management.

Marriage is just kind of weird for anything besides This.

And since marriage of that kind isn't as commonplace in normal society... Yea, seems weird.

I should ask my son's girlfriend's father what kind of dowry she is packing in her hope chest... I could really use a new donkey

Before that it was a formal consolidation of two powerful families becoming one. Akin to a corporate merger.

Yeah we changed it from an unbreakable sacred union sanctified by god to a temporary state of cohabitation so you can both apply for a home loan together...

I mean, what is so binding about a wedding in the first place? It seems like it's just a way for the government to officially recognize a relationship to me rather than anything permanent...

Maybe marriage is just over my head.

I wish they would have thought it through more thoroughly before they got hitched...

no offense.

if the no turning back point isn't when you say "I DO"
then what's the *** point?

Oh, so this is where I left my sock.

Honestly some of the interactions between my grandparents could be really bizarre

It's kind of like at a certain point they decided that it wasn't the best situation, but it's probably too late now to turn back

I know I'm definitely glad my parents separated, I'm sure that splitting up was the best outcome for everyone there

Well, to be honest last I knew they were still married. Though they don't live together, barely talk, and both have relationships outside the marriage.

It's... weird...

Basically, Mom still cares about Dad, Dad thinks Mom can't stand him and is annoyed by how she acts(she is one of those "I'm always right until you 100% prove me wrong and even then I'm stubborn enough to try to be right in some form people) and because she didn't trust him on the road(which... well he did do things eventually so I guess part of that is warrented?) sooo basically after I got into college they had a falling out that really amounted to Dad running off to another state because he was "tired of her ***" and Mom going from being devastated to kind of accepting it but still caring for him over the course of... 1-2 years?

I don't know, my family is ***.

There was a time... not all that long ago really...when woman just sucked it up and took it no matter how shitty things got....most of those women go by the name grandma... /removes hat

But then the mystical oracle of Oprah Winfrey appeared and called *** on all that noise.... she performed several miracles including a plague of bees and then lead women to the promised land of bad divorces, child suppport, and the stark lonliness of reading books in an empty apartment for singles.

now the women are free to say "make your own damn sammich you dirty son of a ***!"

amen

Luckily by the time I was born Dad had stopped the cross country routes where he'd stay up 48+ hours and drive straight to California or DC without stopping. But having him completely gone for 3/4ths of a week was a nightmare on family life and it probably a good part of the reason my parents separated.

That all aside, back when we could go with him it made for great vacations.