Friendliness And Flirting
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Friendliness and Flirting
I don't fall in love easily. Maybe I am just weird.
I was in love once, but then I ate it.
rip in pieces pizza
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Chu Chu said: » Bismarck.Ramyrez said: » Chu Chu said: » I had a lot of guy friends growing up. Didn't really give off that TEEHEE I'M A GIRL TIME TO FLIRT thing. One of the last ones would hang out with me often but I guess things got serious with his girlfriend so he stopped talking to me. No idea :c I still have guy friends online. I think guys can be just friends with girls. Not talking about friend zoning, because I really don't think that exists. You're misunderstanding me. I'm saying reasonable people can come to an amicable solution. But not everyone is reasonable. Some people will chose to feel victimized and project this upon the target of their affection rather than owning up to the fact that it's just not something that's likely to happen, and that's ok. YouTube Video Placeholder
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Bismarck.Ramyrez said: » Leviathan.Chaosx said: » Odin.Zicdeh said: » Ha, I know what you mean. Single Friends: "Are you Free Friday Night?" = PARTY TYME! Married Friends: "Are you free Friday Night?" = Good, we need a babysitter. The odd thing is, my friends are largely left over from college, and (most) all the other married couples have wives (or husbands) from after school who weren't in our circle of friends (and most of them in turn have kids to boot), or they're single. Whereas my wife and I were both in that group of friends in college. We can't get people to hang out with us period. The married ones all really revolve around their damned babies and the single friends seem disinclined to do anything that will not directly result in them having sex. And as we're not that type of couple... I'm not sure where you get this having sex thing from. Some (not all) single people as you refer to them are not interested in the married performance on display. They just want to hang out with their friends. Otherwise it projects a judgmental view on your part that you have to be involved with someone in order to hang out. It's kind of a form of snobbery. Quote: They want to hang out with you or your wife not the conglomeration of both of you. I'm not sure where you get this having sex thing from. Some (not all) single people as you refer to them are not interested in the married performance on display. They just want to hang out with their friends. Otherwise it projects a judgmental view on your part that you have to be involved with someone in order to hang out. It's kind of a form of snobbery. I was speaking specifically of my friends. Not all single people. We do not project the view that you have to be involved with someone to hang out. We've been together a long time. We're well past the public displays of affection and this and that. And what's more, we've been a couple since well before we knew any of them. We were together before we got to college. They always hung out with us then and professed to having a great time. So maybe we're not putting off the vibe we think we are. I will not discount that as an option as I can't really tell from my end. So I can't completely write you off as incorrect. But in this regard I'm only talking about my own friends, not every single person out there. Edit: my point being, the situation you described is not always the case. I was providing my own anecdote as an alternative situation that's happening.
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Leviathan.Chaosx said: » It's kind of a form of snobbery. By the same token, not everyone can oblige those with a Peter Pan syndrome because they have obligations. The drift could be a matter of convenience. Couples with or without children can allot each other a mutual understanding that singles sometimes can't.
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Caitsith.Zahrah said: » Leviathan.Chaosx said: » It's kind of a form of snobbery. I suspect my wife and I have issues precisely because we fall into our own category. I don't know if I'd call it Peter Pan syndrome, but kids are not for us. So there's a mutual situation of alienation with our friends who have children because we don't have children, so they've no real reason to try to identify with us anymore...and they have children, and when we end up together that's all they freaking talk about. Whereas we want to spend time with our single friends, as they're extremely like us in most ways, except that they're single, and that's not going to change hanging out with us. Bismarck.Ramyrez said: » Quote: They want to hang out with you or your wife not the conglomeration of both of you. I'm not sure where you get this having sex thing from. Some (not all) single people as you refer to them are not interested in the married performance on display. They just want to hang out with their friends. Otherwise it projects a judgmental view on your part that you have to be involved with someone in order to hang out. It's kind of a form of snobbery. I was speaking specifically of my friends. Not all single people. We do not project the view that you have to be involved with someone to hang out. We've been together a long time. We're well past the public displays of affection and this and that. And what's more, we've been a couple since well before we knew any of them. We were together before we got to college. They always hung out with us then and professed to having a great time. So maybe we're not putting off the vibe we think we are. I will not discount that as an option as I can't really tell from my end. So I can't completely write you off as incorrect. But in this regard I'm only talking about my own friends, not every single person out there. Edit: my point being, the situation you described is not always the case. I was providing my own anecdote as an alternative situation that's happening. Like I mentioned earlier in this thread, great friend and he had twins 2 years ago. Keeps saying he wants to hang out, but bails every time. After awhile it gets tiresome. Then the reverse is a female friend I had for even longer, who didn't even have kids, last I heard, and as soon as she got married I never heard from her again. You guys get caught in your own bubble just as the couples with kids you know seem to get caught in the have kids like else or don't bother bubble. Caitsith.Zahrah said: » Leviathan.Chaosx said: » It's kind of a form of snobbery. By the same token, not everyone can oblige those with a Peter Pan syndrome because they have obligations. The drift could be a matter of convenience. Couples with or without children can allot each other a mutual understanding that singles sometimes can't. Makes people feel like a tool, like you were never friends to begin with. "Hey yeah I know we were good friends, but your usefulness is over." The true mark of great friendship is the ability to grow up without growing apart.
Unfortunately, all of my friends got married, and moved away from the city, because of lucrative jobs and family friendly areas elsewhere. They can suck a knob.
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People tend to forget if you constantly blow them off, but then you're seen posting on Facebook all the time, doing other things, posting pictures of your trips, it creates the perception that you don't want to be friends. You're only interested in pretending a friendship exists.
Just like that thing of say what you mean. Stop telling me you want to hang out, but never do unless it's with your spouse. Some people may like superficial friendships like that, but not I. Chu Chu said: » I don't fall in love easily. Maybe I am just weird. Like the old King and Queen syndrome. "We're in love, so by default we are better than you. Follow our orders!" Leviathan.Chaosx said: » Chu Chu said: » I don't fall in love easily. Maybe I am just weird. Like the old King and Queen syndrome. "We're in love, so by default we are better than you. Follow our orders!" While I've certainly seen some teenage couples act like that, I've never seen anyone in adult life behave in this fashion. I've certainly never heard of anything called (colloquially or otherwise) "King and Queen" syndrome. In fact, most of the adult married couples I know through work and the like seem to do nothing but *** about each other. Most of my friends who are married are pretty baseline about the subject. I can only assume you've had some fairly bad personal experiences with this phenomena. You're coming across as kind of bitter about it, though.
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See in Scotland we still stick by the Club her and drag her back to the cave style of dating, so flirting and misconstrued feelings don't exist there.
Long Live Scotland!
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Bismarck.Ramyrez said: » In fact, most of the adult married couples I know through work and the like seem to do nothing but *** about each other. What exactly is the point of being together if that's all you do? I wouldn't say bitter, it's more of feeling like this:  Leviathan.Chaosx said: » Bismarck.Ramyrez said: » In fact, most of the adult married couples I know through work and the like seem to do nothing but *** about each other. What exactly is the point of being together if that's all you do? I wouldn't say bitter, it's more of feeling like this: Well no, I agree with you there. But I meant the other part. The "they're in love so they act better than you part". I've never seen anyone do that after about age 19. It's more of a yeah you can come over, but that's about all they will follow through with. Yet they complain nobody will hang out with them. Doesn't make sense to me, and over time the more you try and get them to do something and the more predictable their bailing out becomes, it's hard not to take it personally.
i have had many female friends that i have been involved with romantically and still remain good friends with. What works for me is that, sleep with them or not, i still treat them the same, my friendship towards them stays the same.
Cerberus.Reiden said: » i have had many female friends that i have been involved with romantically and still remain good friends with. What works for me is that, sleep with them or not, i still treat them the same, my friendship towards them stays the same. Rape is rape no matter if you're friends or not. Odin.Minefield said: » the ***
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Cerberus.Midgitis said: » Cerberus.Reiden said: » i have had many female friends that i have been involved with romantically and still remain good friends with. What works for me is that, sleep with them or not, i still treat them the same, my friendship towards them stays the same. Rape is rape no matter if you're friends or not. Get the *** out Ragnarok.Sekundes said: » If there was one thing that I wish humans would do, it's just say what they mean.
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I'm reminded of the book Radical Honesty which challenges the reader to tell the whole truth and see how much different you are when you aren't trying to shape yourself into something you aren't.
You may come off as an unfiltered *** but damned if you do, damned if you don't so might as well tell the truth?
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Tact without truth is politics. Truth without tact will get you killed.
I still prefer truth though. Leviathan.Chaosx said: » This. What exactly is the point of being together if that's all you do? I wouldn't say bitter, it's more of feeling like this: Financial ties, children, public shame of having gone through a divorce, fallout from going broke trying to kill eachother legally, religion, commitment to vows, apathy etc. Many people just don't see being 45 and going back into the singles mixer scene. The fear of being alone and old is enough to keep most people safely in their crumbling fortresses pining for the days of HS football and that one time they did a keg handstand while getting a ***. It's tragic and always in the back of my mind as it seems like a horrible way to live and most certainly the path to alcoholism and pill popping your way to the grave. I'd say I don't know the signs but all I need do is point to a few family members and woop, there it is.
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Lakshmi.Sparthosx said: » Leviathan.Chaosx said: » This. What exactly is the point of being together if that's all you do? I wouldn't say bitter, it's more of feeling like this: Financial ties, children, public shame of having gone through a divorce, fallout from going broke trying to kill eachother legally, religion, commitment to vows, apathy etc. Many people just don't see being 45 and going back into the singles mixer scene. The fear of being alone and old is enough to keep most people safely in their crumbling fortresses pining for the days of HS football and that one time they did a keg handstand while getting a ***. It's tragic and always in the back of my mind as it seems like a horrible way to live and most certainly the path to alcoholism and pill popping your way to the grave. I'd say I don't know the signs but all I need do is point to a few family members and woop, there it is. People love to *** and moan, but never do anything about it. No wonder why a common enemy unites people temporary. Without a common enemy people are left dazed and confused on how to live a happy life. As Einstein said, "The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." Cerberus.Midgitis said: » Cerberus.Reiden said: » i have had many female friends that i have been involved with romantically and still remain good friends with. What works for me is that, sleep with them or not, i still treat them the same, my friendship towards them stays the same. Rape is rape no matter if you're friends or not. Odin.Minefield said: » the *** Inside joke. YouTube Video Placeholder |
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