Random Thoughts.....What Are You Thinking?

good night..

The closest thing I have ever experienced to that is something of a recurring nightmare for me, being chased by this thing I can't explain, in fact when I'm awake I can't even begin to describe it, in any sense, not what it looks like, not how it sounds, it's almost intangible..

Anyways, I halfway know I'm asleep, not enough that I can take control of the dream, and not enough to really grasp 'it can't hurt me' but enough to know that all I have to do is wake up.. But I can't. This thing will chase me for hours, through different dreams, the entire night, I feel absolute terror and dread, I can only imagine it would be similar to being on a plane over the middle of the ocean at about 40,000 feet when the wings rip off and you know there's absolutely no hope, yet it will still take you a couple minutes to hit the water, you KNOW you're fixing to die, and there's not a damned thing you can do about it..

Often I wake up and I'm drenched in sweat so bad that I'm shivering from our A/C, I'll have to get up, get a towel, dry myself off (I don't even sleep with a shirt anymore because of this) get another, and lay it on the bed before I can go back to sleep (wife's in bed too, so I can't like take the sheet off or flip the mattress or anything, I just have to ride it out until morning).

It's kinda tapered off a bit now and happens once every couple of months, but for a while there, was happening every other night, or more. Actually, I used to have nightmares about once or twice a year, but at 18/19 a looooot of drama and heart ache hit my life and I started having nightmares all the time.. Namely being almost close enough/quick enough to save my brother, but always just out of reach.. Then as I started to accept what had happened, these new ones replaced those. Pretty sure they're still interconnected (the monster being the guilt/sorrow/burden I carry with me all the time when I'm awake).. Knowing why they happen doesn't much help how I feel about it though =/

If she did, I don't remember.. I'm the 'psychologist' of the two of us.. And consciously, I don't blame myself.. But my subconscious sure seems to..

The dream thread... It wants to eat your dreams.

Morninggggggggggggg

You could be if you went to sleep a few hours ago!

I was going to say you can troll me nini <3

lol she prolly sleeping tho :O

Morning all

Random thought, can't attempt to cheer people up when they don't reply

Random thought, can't reply to people who try to cheer you up if stupid cell bounced off Canada and you lose signal. :(

Excuses, excuses.

Random thought... Those thoughts don't seem so random.

That wasn't really random either....

It is random for I wanted to cheer up my friend who got shot in the buttock but will not reply :(

I told you its not good to keep throwing things at Canada ^^

Someone got shot?

You have a friend who got shot in the buttock? :O

Maybe this is slang for something...

Random thought, why did that that thread get deleted?

With a paintball D: she says she has a huge bruise on a cheek.

/texts krizz a random excuse

owait..
fail.

/sadpanda face

wait what..shot in the arse..

Guys this time he is not talking about me -.-;

Holy balls starcade is insane

Oh, only a paintball. For a second I thought you were going to make a Forest Gump joke.

Nah I don't make jokes about actual gun shots, seen a few too many in my time